Celebrating a birthday away from home

When I was a kid, birthdays were a big deal.  I always had at least two parties (one with friends and one with family).  My parents took me out to dinner at the restaurant of my choosing and were very generous with gifts. It was fun to feel like the entire world revolved around me for just a day. 

My first birthday...celebrating with all my mom's friend's kids

As I grew up, my birthday gradually became less relevant. 

The first time I celebrated my birthday away from home was the year I studied in London during undergrad. I went out with friends from my dorm, but there was no need to mark my legal drinking age because I had been free to drink ever since I arrived in Europe nine months earlier.  Even though I was away from family during this time, it was still nice to have friends around. 

Little did I know, this marked the first of many years that I was unable to celebrate with family on my actual birthday. I usually went out with friends to mark the occasion (and to distract me from the reality of getting older). One year, I even took a trip to Florida with some of my best friends, but we all got so sunburnt that we barely made it through dinner on my actual birthday. 

2008 was the first time I had to travel for work on my birthday. I was alone throughout the work day, but I was lucky enough to be in the New York metro area where I met up with friends for dinner. As an added perk, my boss even allowed me to get a room at the Ritz-Carlton Central Park. 

The next year wasn't nearly as glamorous. I was working in Birmingham, Alabama and the view from my office window was this: 

Birthday shopping in Birmingham?

I remember spending an hour researching restaurants so I could at least treat myself to the perfect meal. After searching through menus, I decided on a trendy seafood restaurant called Ocean. Was the food great? Absolutely.  Was it depressing to eat dinner alone on my birthday? A little.  On the bright side, I had plans to go out with friends just a couple nights later (once I returned home to Washington, DC). 

2010 was the year of the MBA in Barcelona. It should have been an incredible place to ring in yet another year of my life. Unfortunately, a few conflicts during the semester caused classes to be rescheduled, and my birthday was the one and only time that we had a triple session of classes.  For nine hours, I sat behind my computer and listened to lectures.  By the end of this learning marathon, everyone quietly filtered out of the lecture hall and went straight home. Myself included.  

The following year, I had just moved to Chicago and I had about 2 friends. My friend Thom took me out for drinks and we closed out the night at a country-western bar. Even though I was technically "home", it didn't feel like home at all. 

2012 was a year of birthday redemption. I was traveling in Europe with a team from my office and my boss loves having an excuse to do nice things. My day actually started in Luxembourg, where I had been the night before for an awesome half-marathon. I spent the morning admiring the city and taking some photos, before catching a train to Paris. 

In Paris, I was fortunate enough to be staying at a super exclusive hotel and my first ride in the elevator was shared with someone who "seemed famous" (although I had no idea who he was). As we were heading out to dinner, the same guy was sitting in the lounge and I pointed him out to a colleague.  Turns out, the entire Vampire Diaries cast was staying at the hotel, and the guy I rode the elevator with earlier was Paul Wesley. Rubbing shoulders with celebrities was just the start of a fun evening. We enjoyed a dinner cruise along the Seine River and spent some time walking around the city. Strolling through Le Jardin des Tuileries reminded me that business trip birthdays can be fun, too.

Birthday evening in Paris, 2012

Over the course of the week in Paris, the hotel was filled with celebrities and the back of my head even had a youtube cameo at 1:02, when I entered the hotel with a colleague while fans were screaming over Ian Somerhalder. This was also the week of the French Open and I shared an elevator ride with the Federer family one morning on my way to breakfast.  Birthday week win! 

I expected 2013 to be a quiet birthday. I was alone in Casablanca and I arrived at the office just like any other day. A couple of the local managers suggested having lunch at the hotel's fine dining restaurant, which was a perfect coincidence for me. Then, out of nowhere, I heard the General Manager singing happy birthday and walking out with a cake and champagne! Somehow, the staff discovered that it was my birthday and I couldn't have been more surprised.

My Mom sent 8 birthday cards to my hotel in Casablanca

This year in Melbourne, I was working alone in my room and wondering whether anyone would discover it was my birthday. At lunch with some of the staff, we were discussing a new hire named "Kate" who joined several existing members of the sales team with the same name. This reminded the table that the majority of the Finance team was born during the month of October. Out of pure coincidence, they asked about my birthday and I admitted that it is today. They all offered an obligatory "Happy Birthday!", but it just wasn't feeling so happy to me since this was practically my only human interaction throughout the entire day. 

For dinner, I went down to the hotel restaurant and was told that it was closed for a private event. They offered room service as an alternative, but the only thing more pathetic than eating alone is eating alone in my room. I went back upstairs, grabbed a Kit Kat out of the minibar and rented a movie that ended up being a heartbreaking documentary. By 9pm, I was depleted of energy and opted to go to sleep early.

Fortunately, the next morning brought a fresh mind and renewed enthusiasm. I received several messages from friends who discovered it was my birthday via the Facebook reminder while I was asleep. I chatted with a friend in Hong Kong, received a call in my hotel from friends in New York and DC, and even received a birthday cake from the hotel.  

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One interesting thing about this blog is that the recollection of events sometimes helps to change my perception of them. I was initially going to write about how difficult it is to be away from home on your birthday.  But then I realized that I have enjoyed a few excellent birthdays on the road. I have also experienced some birthdays at home that have not lived up to my lofty expectations. 

A birthday is just another day except that it holds special meaning to one person.  The celebration should be about what makes that person happy. I love spending time with family and friends on my birthday, but I also love to explore the world.  Some years, those two desires are in conflict with each other. This was one of those years.  

Instead of complaining about one boring night, I will focus on the countless ways my life has been enriched as a result of my global travels. My lifestyle requires me to make a number of personal sacrifices, but it also affords me with opportunities that few people get to experience. This year, I just had to wait a little longer to eat my cake.  

Anticipating the holidays

The month of December usually puts me in a festive mood, as I prepare for the holidays with family and friends.  I love seeing the lights on the trees, attending Christmas parties, and even listening to the hokey songs as I rush through the malls.  It's the one time of year when traditions and comforts of home are really important to me. 

I will admit that the weeks leading up to Christmas were difficult for me this year.  My project in Paris was really stressful and I was working completely on my own, without any other human interaction (other than lunch).  

Most of my friends thought I was crazy for complaining about an extended assignment in Paris.  On the surface, I don't blame them.  Paris is a beautiful city - especially during the holidays.  My hotel is literally in the ideal location for exploring the city and it was decorated beautifully for Christmas.  The view from my office was also enough to put even the grinch in a festive mood. 

Christmas lights make everything more festive

However, there was one important thing missing: warmth.  I'm not talking about the heat in the building or even the weather outside.  I'm talking about the feeling that the holidays should bring. 

I tried listening to Christmas music on my computer as I worked.  I also ventured outside the hotel as much as possible, so I could marvel at the decorations around the city and absorb the energy from people around me.  After almost two months in the same place, the excitement of exploring the city had dissipated and I found myself wishing that I could enjoy my surroundings with people I care about. 

Fortunately, I was completely re-energized one weekend when a good friend from my MBA program visited.  Since graduating, we have managed to see each other once per year (2011 in Zurich and 2012 in London) so I was really excited to keep the tradition going.  We walked through the Christmas market near the Champs Elysées, drank some mulled wine, marveled at the lights, and stopped for a traditional tourist picture in front of the Eiffel Tower. 

Enjoying an evening in Paris

By the time we returned to the hotel the first night, we had traversed nearly the entire city.  I barely remember seeing anything because we just talked incessantly everywhere we went.  As much as I wish we could see each other more often, it's so nice to know that we can always pick up right where we left off and have such a fun time together.  

To be completely honest, Christmas decorations in Paris are a mixed bag.  Maybe I have been to too many amazing German Christmas markets, but the one in Paris doesn't even come close.  It was completely overcrowded with tourists (no surprise) and it felt like 90% of the booths just sold junk food and cheap gifts.  There were very few high-quality items for sale and nothing that was really worth stuffing into my suitcase.  It's probably great for kids (several rides, a big ice-skating rink, and even a santa that rides a sleigh along a cable in the sky), but the only thing that appealed to me was the spiced wine.  

Even the lights along the Champs-Elysées were a disappointment, compared to what I was anticipating.  All the pictures I have seen online look like this: 

This is how I imagined the christmas lights to look

But here's the reality: 

This is how the Christmas lights actually looked 

The Arc de Triomphe was right behind me in this photo and it always looks nice all lit up, but what's with the modern LED "rings"??  I want the trees to glitter with traditional lights!!

At least Place Vendôme lived up to expectations, with more Christmas trees lining the street than I could have even imagined.  I was walking past La Canadienne one night and they actually had a live sheep in the display window.  Ok, Paris, you win.  This really is one of the best cities in the world for Christmas shopping. 

Place Vendome, decorated for Christmas

I was so excited to return home that the last few days of the project passed at lightening speed.  Miraculously, all my hard work started coming together and I could see many positive results.  I was proud of myself for persevering through a very difficult project without any guidance and for all that I taught myself along the way.  

Considering all the places I could have been stuck for almost two months, central Paris is actually one of the best alternatives.  Without such beautiful surroundings, the weekend visit from my friend, and encouragement along the way from my parents, I may have actually gone insane.   Fortunately, the project ended on a high note and I could not be more excited to spend two weeks at home with family and friends.  

Cafés of Paris

Returning to Paris after vacation felt a little like coming back home.  

...to a home that I don't like so much.

Part of the problem is the food.  It's not that the hotel restaurant is bad, but no one wants to eat every meal from a single menu for six weeks.  I don't usually care much about food, but French cuisine is particularly unappealing to me.  Breads are boring, sauces are too rich, and proteins involve parts of the animal that I would never consider eating.

My mindset about being back in Paris changed a little when I was working in a meeting room earlier this week, with a great view of Le Palais Royal.  I stopped to look outside the window and ended up spending about five minutes just watching the activity at a nearby café.  It was fun to watch people enjoying the nice weather, while they sipped coffee and watched the activity around them.  The waiters were clad in black vests and bow ties, which added to the Parisian feel.    

Hard to concentrate on work with this view 

People enjoying a beautiful day at the café

When I looked back at my computer, I realized that I had been focusing too much on work and failing to appreciate the my prime location within one of the finest cities in the world. I may not love the food in Paris, but I do love looking at all the cafés and markets that line the streets.  On Saturday morning, I meandered through the streets and took pictures of anything that attracted my attention. 

Produce market

The Dog That Smokes (who comes up with these names?)

I'll just grab a rotisserie chicken from the sidewalk!

Each chair is lined up perfectly

This place was decorated for the holidays

Each café I saw was unique, yet similar.  They all try to maximize sidewalk space with little round tables crammed together.  Heat lamps were blazing, while a few brave souls continued to eat outside.  Weekly specials are almost always written on the chalkboard by the entrance so passerby's can contemplate the menu.  Onion soup, steak with frites, and chocolate mousse are commonplace in Paris.  The city is so steeped with history and culinary traditions are an important part of that.  

Walking back to my hotel, I thought about restaurants in the United States.  Even the smaller towns have a greater variety of food options than what is offered in Paris.  This is probably a reflection of the diverse American population.     

I often look at Europe with admiration, but I need to give credit to the United States when it is deserved.  Food choice is definitely one of those areas.  I never really think about food at home because I can buy almost anything I need, whenever I am in the mood for it: sushi, pizza, mexican, thai, italian...you name it.  

The cafés and markets in Paris are definitely picturesque and meandering down every street is like walking through a postcard.  However, I don't want to eat a postcard and I also don't want to eat what most of these cafés are serving.  Maybe I should open a Mexican restaurant in Paris - just to see what would happen!  

Paris

I should love Paris.  The architecture is beautiful, the people speak a language that I understand, and the city is full of culture and history.  However, for some unknown reason, I just have never really enjoyed it as much as other cities in Europe. 

For a two week project, it is hardly a sacrifice to be working in Paris so I really don’t mind being back.  I arrived by early afternoon on Monday and was immediately thrust into the most complex project I have ever faced at work.  Part of me feels completely overwhelmed but a larger part feels excited to conquer a challenge that I have never encountered before.  Hopefully I will succeed.

My hotel is in the perfect location – literally across the street from the Louvre.  When I look out my window, I can actually see statues through the window of the museum.  Unfortunately, this is the closest I will get to the Louvre this week because I’m just too busy to be a tourist. 

Here's the view from my bedroom window

On Sunday evening, I made time to attend a Vespers service at Notre Dame Cathedral.  I always enjoyed the intimate atmosphere of the services in Cologne and London but I should have known that this place would be entirely different.  Apparently Notre Dame is 850 years old this year, so it is even more popular than usual.  So popular, in fact, that they built viewing platforms across from the façade just so people could take pictures. 

As I was waiting in line just to walk through the door, I realized that I don’t like Paris because it makes me feel like a tourist.  I’m just one of millions of people who parade through the cathedral and it doesn’t feel special anymore.  Maybe I care too much about feeling like a local but I just get bored more easily when I’m seeing a site that has already been photographed by millions of people this year alone. (Ok, that still didn't stop me from taking some pictures myself!)    

Here are the viewing stands in front of Notre Dame Cathedral

I joined the crowd for a picture of the cathedral

I spent one morning running through the adjacent Tuileries gardens and along the Seine because the fitness room was occupied.  It is admittedly really cool to run through the arches of the palace and past statues that are probably older than my country.  I try to look like a local although I’m sure everyone probably knows immediately that I am just a foreigner, trying too hard to look like a local.

In a further attempt to live like a local, I signed up for an 8k race on Armistice Day called Les Bacchantes.  The run was organized to raise money for prostate cancer and it played up the “movember” theme by asking participants to wear a moustache for the run.  Part of me wanted to grow a mustache for the run but then I felt too ridiculous after one day of stubble, so I chickened out.  

The race started near L’Arc de Triomphe and I am familiar enough with the area to get to the starting line without a map.  Go me.  Such a local!   As I turned to jog up the Champs-Élysées, I noticed that the street was blocked for a special event and I was forced to detour.  A map would have been nice at that moment, but I tuned in my inner-compass and navigated my way back to where I needed to be. 

The race was a lot of fun and I was amazed to see that the vast majority of people were wearing a moustache (mostly fake ones).  However, one question lingered in my mind: Where did all these people find fake mustaches?!?  It’s not such a common accessory in America…  In the end, I finished in the top 2% and with a respectable time, but still far from my personal best.  Hopefully I can get my speed back up again someday.

Week #2 in Paris has been a challenge but I pushed through and motivated myself with plenty of macarons, crepes, and floating island desserts.  I don’t like French food but their desserts are pretty incredible.  This is probably one of the reasons why I am not running fast anymore but you only live once.

Unfortunately, my project remains unresolved and I learned that I must come back to Paris a few more times before the end of the year.  I already have other projects planned, so this will require a lot of juggling.  On the positive side, return trips to Paris will give me plenty of opportunities to appreciate a city that I should already love.